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| Sunday, January 7th, 2007 | | 11:25 pm |
Oh Revelation!!
I love the book of revelation. Revelation says that those who read it and take it to heart will be blessed. But often times it just seems like a confusing puzzle about the end times. So then what is this great blessing of revelation? Most of the time what we need is not so much the word of God in our heads, as we need it in our hearts. Most of us who have been Christians for a while know a lot of facts about God and the bible, but we are in a constant struggle to get those facts into our hearts so that they are a living reality to us. We know that true riches are patience, truth, faith, righteousness, love, etc...but still we cling to the things of this world as if the size of out bank account really was what mattered. We know that God is good, but we struggle with fears about our own unknown future. We know that we have no right to judge others because we ourselves have been forgiven, and yet we struggle not to look down on others because of their past sins even long after they have repented. We struggle to get the bible into our hearts, not just into our heads. This is the greatest blessing that I think is available to those who read revelation. Its stark imagery teleports us into a new way of seeing the world. It's not just a list of facts to memorize, it is a beautifully painted picture of words which more than once has left me in a cold sweat of awe. Rev 4:8 "and the four living creatures, having each one of them six wings, are full of eyes round about and within: and they have no rest day and night, crying out, Holy, holy, holy, is the Lord God Almighty, who was and who is and who is to come..." | | Saturday, November 25th, 2006 | | 1:41 pm |
Thank you God. Naps are good. | | Friday, November 3rd, 2006 | | 5:01 pm |
So, Today while packaging screws at the shop a dialog occured in my head between 3 personalities - Mr. Computer head, Smiley the stick figure, and the Melancholy poet. They were having a meeting regarding the current set of life decisions before me. Smiley was the ironically the most concrete of the 3. He always seems to know exactly what he wants. His arguments were short and to the point, so that soon he ran out of things to say and just made silly noises for the remainder of the meeting. Mr. Computer head was quite the opposite. Very convincing as he was with his intricate web of ever expanding facts and conclusions, I don't think he ever found steady ground; for every one of his sentences ended with a demand for more data. The Melancholy Poet didn't really present ideas per say, but his riddles and moanings where enchanting. I feel I could never really trust him though, despite the fact that something in me deeply wants too; so I placed the seats of Smily and Mr. Computer between mine and his. This way when I feel myself being wooed by his rhythms and prose beyond comfort-ability, it will take only a tipping of my head to remove him from view. | | Tuesday, October 31st, 2006 | | 7:42 pm |
It tis Halloween night. Twas a good day at work as well as with my projects at home. I am reminded once again that there is a time and a season for everything under the sun. I think today play would have been to me as a burden while work was a sweet aroma to my soul. From solitude to friendship - the nuts and bolts of plain logic to the ecstacy of emotion - From childlike play to melancholic depth; Let all be for the Glory of God! Hardy har har!! | | Thursday, October 5th, 2006 | | 3:54 pm |
"If at first, the idea is not absurd, there is no hope for it." -- Albert Einstein
* "I think there is a world market for maybe five computers." --Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943 * "I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won't last out the year." --The editor in charge of business books for Prentice Hall, 1957 * "But what ... is it good for?" --Engineer at the Advanced Computing Systems Division of IBM, 1968, commenting on the microchip. * "There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home." --Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977 * "This 'telephone' has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us." --Western Union internal memo, 1876. * "The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?" --David Sarnoff's associates in response to his urgings for investment in the radio in the 1920s. * "The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C,' the idea must be feasible." --A Yale University management professor in response to Fred Smith's paper proposing reliable overnight delivery service. (Smith went on to found Federal Express Corp.) * "Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?" --H. M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927. * "We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out." --Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962. * "If I had thought about it, I wouldn't have done the experiment. The literature was full of examples that said you can't do this." --Spencer Silver on the work that led to the unique adhesives for 3-M "Post-It" Notepads. * "Drill for oil? You mean drill into the ground to try and find oil? You're crazy." --Drillers who Edwin L. Drake tried to enlist to his project to drill for oil in 1859. * "Aeroplanes are interesting toys but of no military value." --Marechal Ferdinand Foch, Professor of Strategy, Ecole Superieure de Guerre. * "Everything that can be invented has been invented." --Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899. * "640K ought to be enough for anybody." -- Bill Gates, 1981 | | Tuesday, October 3rd, 2006 | | 11:51 pm |
I've been studying my own emotional patterns and I think I have concluded that I crave both control and expansion of my world-box. Shocking. Whoo-HAA! | | Tuesday, September 26th, 2006 | | 4:04 pm |
"There have been times when I think we do not desire heaven; but more often I find myself wondering whether, in our heart of hearts, we have ever desired anything else." -C.S.Lewis yup. | | Saturday, September 16th, 2006 | | 12:38 pm |
| | Monday, July 31st, 2006 | | 1:45 pm |
Music Music Music
I need to learn to let go of some pieces...I notice that if I start off a song on the right track during the first couple hours of its creation, it tends to progress in a fairly linear upward fashion towards a happy completion...but if after the first couple hours of work it does not seem to be going someplace I like, even after 2 weeks of working on it I still think it is crap. Just more of it that there was before. I am hereby announcing to myself and to the rest of the world as witness my intention to be more willing to trash my own abomidable creations before they grow up to be monsters, so that I may show more tender affections to my beloved works. | | Friday, May 26th, 2006 | | 11:26 pm |
My heart sinks pulling me down through the bed and into the deep of the earth. my mind is the wimper of a child, my body a silk thin petal on the battlefield. Who is able to dwell with me in the depths? Only the Lord. Only the Lord. | | Sunday, May 7th, 2006 | | 6:52 am |
Love love love love love!! NUMBER 2 !!!!
Recently people have started posting comments about one of my old journal entries. I am going to re-state the general idea behind the theory, broken up into specific points with examples. This way, rather than debating or commenting on the theory as a whole, you can pick out the specific part of the theory you want to discuss or expand upon. ----------------------------THE DEFINTIONS!! ---------------------- ==INTROSPECTION == Introspective thought occurs when one grasps at an experience as a tool to try and make themselves feel good rather than simply experiencing the thing for the sake of knowing it intimately. -Introspective- ok, I’m at the sunset…do I feel good yet…not really…hmmm, what about now…come on! Feel good! Feel good! Feel good! Feel good! What’s the matter with you! Sunsets are beautiful right? I mean, everyone says so…so enjoy it self! I command thee! -Not introspective- - that beam of orange light is just gliding across the horizon….it fits so perfectly onto the canvas of blue gradient sky….(it is so beautiful! I feel joy!) ==AN ATTEMPT== Trying to experience something, but your not actually getting it. To see and not understand. - I’m going to try to experience the moonlight sonata, but I do not feel the sorrow and longing that is expressed through the playing of the notes, so I have not experienced the moonlight sonata. - I’m going to try to enjoy this sunset, but I see it as just a random chaotic arrangement of molecules in the sky rather than as an expression of a loving God so there is no real reason to be thankful for it nor anyone to be thankful too, so I do not REALLY see the sunset. - I’m going to try to understand the phrase, “Please pass the salt.” But I do not speak English so I have no idea what it means, so I do not really understand, “Please pass the salt.” - I’m going to try to like you, but I really think you are annoying and that there is nothing actually likable about you, so I do not actually like you. ---------------------THE ARGUMENT!!!!!------------------------- 1. INTROSPECTION turns experience into an ATTEMPT to experience since it keeps us from seeing clearly. Because… A. You must be looking outside yourself to experience something outside yourself. B. You cannot focus both inside yourself and outside yourself at the same time. Therefore… To the degree you are INTROSPECTING your experience has been turned into an ATTEMPT to experience. So if you want to have real joy, you must have real love. For Love is able to fully enjoy because it is focused on the object of appreciation, rather than on the self as appreciator. | | Tuesday, March 14th, 2006 | | 11:49 pm |
Life is better when...
Life is better when you can let it go. Food is so much more enjoyable when it is not an addiction. Money is so much more useful when it is not a god. There is so much more freedom in a relationship when there is more to your life than just the relationship. Work is so much less stressful when your willing to let go of your time and do the job right. Waiting seems so much shorter when you don't need it now. Living so much less dead when your reason for living is not mearly your life. "...unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit." | | Friday, March 10th, 2006 | | 5:28 am |
Well, it's 5:30 in the morning and I have been up all night writing, composing, reading blogs, and updating my web site...I just did not get tired last night at all. I don't think I have ever stayed up and not even gotten tired before. Whats up with that? So I was thinking perhaps the brain is a physical vehicle through which the eternal soul enters time. I picture the soul as being like a book...the story of our eternal existence...and the brain as being like the lense through which we are reading the book. The condition of the lense is able to effect how clearly we can understand the book. In the same way, it is through the mind that we catch glimpses of understanding into the eternal, but we cannot see the whole thing since the lense by nature is ment to focus on small parts of a whole. but hmmmm... I think that analogy breaks down at a point because it is hard to imagin why a book would also effect the lense viewing it, in the way that the soul effects the mind through which we are trying to comprehend the soul in the first place. It is the soul that gives the mind will to think. Even the physical chemicals of the brain are effected by the soul, so it is a two way street, the two, as long as they are connected, act together as one body, much in the same way that as long as my hand is connected to my brain, stabbing my hand will make it hard to think clearly, and the brain is the thing which gives my hand the ability to move. This parallels how, if you get brain damage, you will not understand anything as clearly as you once did, including the soul, and yet it is the brain which relies in the soul, not the soul on the brain. Yes, I think this is a better analogy. The hand represents the mind, and the brain represents the soul...so the body is the hand of the soul. Fun Cheese of Goodness. Well, that little ramble was fun, but my left eyelid actually felt a little bit of weight a moment ago. This is a good sign. I think I will go eat some oatmeal. (food usually helps get me sleepy) | | Saturday, February 11th, 2006 | | 10:24 pm |
Why why why....
Why is it so easy to quickly slip into darkened thinking...I am not talking about some kind of blatantly sinful thought life or anything like that, but I mean DARK thinking. Unawareness of the presence of God. Not realizing that you have not been drinking of his spirit and are dying of thirst, until your soul is hacking blood out of its dry parched mouth, and only then finally plunging into his grace again to be new again. Why do I sometimes not breath until my spiritual lips are blue? I think I am more alive than I once was, because I notice when I am dying with greater ease than I once did. Yet it seems so hard for me to keep a grasp on the fact that no good thing comes from myself, but that goodness and mercy are there for me to drink, freely, so that I may have it in myself. Then the good, the beautiful, the pure, is me and is in myself, yet not from myself but from him. I know this as I know any psychological event that occurs in my mind, yet so often I have trouble KNOWING this, since I still forget on occasion to drink. ..oh that all of all of us would drink by faith, and kill the foolish imagination which thinks it can quench its thirst by the sheer power of its own will. | | Monday, January 16th, 2006 | | 6:39 pm |
Because God is love... My favorite thing to do in the shower is to sing "as a dear panteth for the water" I giggle with delight at the silly smile of a friend and am assured of the simple accessibility of the gospel, where God's hand of mercy is extended to all who would call on him. Because God is God... My mind seeks and wonders and stirs in a cold sweat as the silent awe of his profundity consumes me My eyes desire to be ever opened wider to the infinite complexity, variety and depth of the mind of the eternal and I am driven to engage the beauty of scholarship, study and thought. That God is love and that God is God grants me joy for the fleeting moment of what I have today and joy for the eternal dive into the person of God, which is both engaged and looked forward too every moment of life. | | Sunday, January 15th, 2006 | | 11:58 am |
Mar 9:47 And if your eye causes you to sin, tear it out. It is better for you to enter the kingdom of God with one eye than with two eyes to be thrown into hell, Mar 9:48 where their worm does not die and the fire is not quenched. Mar 9:49 For everyone will be salted with fire. Today my pastor did a sermon about how when he was a little kid he was pretty popular and he knew a little girl who had lived in 18 different homes, had a broken family, and was the lowest person in the pecking order at school. All the other kids teased her and treated her badly. My pastor felt sorry for her and became friends with her...until he started getting picked on too. When he saw that it would cost something to choose compassion he fell away. When the fire comes to salt us we have to make a choice. We must either sacrifice the ego or our soul. The fire always demands that something be burned. When love shows itself to have a cost, we must choose either to cling to the love and give up our comfort, or cling to our comfort and lose the love. When we are treated wrongly we must either sacrifice our rights and give ourselves completely to God, or sacrifice our hearts so that we may cling to our rights. When we are confronted with an unrighteous way of thinking or acting we must either sacrifice our pride for the truth, or cling to the truth at the expense of our pride. Everyone will be salted with fire. It is only in the fire where our true motivations are revealed, because it is in the fire where we chose between heaven or hell - the truth or a lie - the glory of man or the glory of God - darkness or light - our right eye or the kingdom of God. | | Saturday, January 14th, 2006 | | 12:51 pm |
Love love love love love!!!
So the other day I had a discussion with Joe about how one is supposed to escape the prison of introspective thought. What I mean by this is thinking about communicating rather than communicating- trying to be alive rather than being alive - thinking rather than experiencing the enjoyment of thought. Joe and I came up with some thoeries about how to help escape introspecitve thought (some of which involved the consumption of controled substances), but today I was thinking that really the only cure for this disease of the mind is love. When you excape yourself and get into love you are free to be yourself rather than trying to be yourself, because your thoughts have come out of yourself and onto the object of love. Finally, every creative, communicative, expressive endeavor is free to be a means of experiencing a joy you already have rather than an attempt to attain a joy you don't have by means of an experince. Introspective thought occures when one is "attempting" to produce joy by grasping for an experience. Love reverses these roles so that the joy comes first. It is because (1) the experience is enjoyed, that (2) the experience is really able to be experienced. Watching the sunset in the gulf of mexico can only really be experienced if you are enjoying it. If you are trying to attain joy by watching a sunset in the gulf of mexico, the ability to experience the sunset is diminished to a degree equal to that of your introspection.(Introspection being your attempting to use the experience as a means of attaining joy) So, in conclusion, if you want to really experience joy, self help isn't the key..its falling in love! (hmmm...but how to fall in love...by experiencing perhaps? oh poop. Did I just make a circle...no, maybe not. There is a difference between experiencing to fall in love (to appreciate the object of experience) and experiencing to obtain joy...although, would joy be the motivator that causes us to seek love in the first place? ugg. Maybe I'm getting to introspective about the whole ordeal. just go out there and do some loving already!) | | Thursday, January 12th, 2006 | | 7:50 pm |
For the love of Pain
Music has been torturing me all day and I love it. I've been trying to come up with something new and interesting for JeremySong.com all day and most of my efforts have turned to junk for the musical scrap heap...but I think I have nice simple ditty going now that has some smooth soft nostalgic sad-happy vibes it wants to share with the world. yeeeesssss! | | Wednesday, January 11th, 2006 | | 11:19 pm |
showdown between blood and clay
Joh 18:36 Jesus answered, "My kingdom is not of this world..." So yesterday I went to Christian challenge and we watched a video about Jesus' birth taking place under the rule of the ruthless and powerful kind Herod. He had a huge palace that overshadowed Bethlehem, and when he heard that the little baby Jesus had been born he went on a killing spree trying to stop the coming of Christ's kingdom. Now Herod's palace is in ruins, fading away into the dust of history as Christ's kingdom continues forward from this day even unto eternity. Noah believed God while the world scoffed. The world was washed away as Noah's legacy continued. Melchizedek and his city of peace (Jerusalem) served God in the midst of the mighty Canaanite cities...Now Jaruselem stands and the Canaanites are only a distant memory. Moses preferred the reproach of Christ to the riches Egypt. Moses now has the riches of heaven. Pharaoh's riches were buried with his corps. The cross shines through as a pinpoint of light, steadily calling while all else fades away. What wisdom of man could have guessed the infant would overshadow the ruins of the kingdoms of the earth? | | 2:28 pm |
I was just thinking about how apparent joy can really be despair and how apparent despair can really be joy. In The Great Divorce it talked about how "the grey town" was to the saved heaven all along, and to the un-saved hell all along, because when looking back from eternity those in hell will see only drudgery in what they thought at the moment was joy, and those in heaven will look back and see only pools of water where they once thought was dry desert. I can even see this now in my own experience. For those sinful things which I thought were pleasures in the moment of their indulgence, I look back and can only become sick over it's poisonous ravishing of my heart. And for all longings and pains embraced for the desire of God are seen from my present view as sweet refreshment for my soul, filling and pouring over into pure joy. The universe in its eternal perspective certainly is a mysterious place. Something totally unexpected to the eyes of finite reasoning. |
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